The International Language

I live in a wonderful neighborhood in Chicago called Rogers Park.
It has been called one of the most culturally diverse neighborhoods in the entire United States.  So, obviously there are many different cultures and peoples running around this area of Chicago.
On the one hand, it makes my neighborhood an exciting and interesting place to live...with the small ethnic restaurants that serve fantastic food to the little mom and pop stores that sell international jewelry and wares, it always makes for a fun weekend.

But, and I know many people are going to think I'm insensitive and hypocritical, I wish everyone would just SPEAK ENGLISH!

I mean really, you're going to come to the United States to live and open a business, but you don't or won't learn the native language of the country?  REALLY?  I think 6 months to a year after someone moves to this country, they should be required to take an exam...written and oral on the english language.
If you pass, great!  Welcome to America!  If you fail, get your foreign ass back on the boat!  And, don't come back until you can hold a conversation...IN ENGLISH!
(Broken English may be accepted...but it will be on a case by case basis.  So, it would help if you were really cute).

I realize I'm ranting.  But, it really infuriates when I call my favorite Chinese restaurant to deliver dinner and the person on the phone cannot speak a lick of english...how on earth are you going to take my order?

I've often thought it would be super funny to get a t-shirt made that simply said, in HUGE letters, SPEAK ENGLISH!...and wear it all over Chicago.  If I knew I wouldn't get shot, I probably would have done it already.

Life's little moments

We all have those embarrassing moments in life that we'd like to forget.  Like many folks, I feel that I've had more than my fair share of embarrassing moments and fuck-ups.  Luckily, the vast majority of those moments happened WAY back in my high school and college years.  I have been fortunate enough to keep the embarrassing moments in my adult life to a minimum.

But, why is it that when you least expect it, a memory of one of those less-than-stellar moments creeps into your head?

It never fails...I'm having a great day; the outfit is working; If I had hair, the hair would be FIERCE; the wit and charm is off the chart; I'm flirting and schmoozing; no gas or bloating...THIS DAY ROCKS!
Then, you let your mind wander for just a second, and the memory of one of those embarrassing moments pops into your head....W T F!

Is this nature's way of keeping your attitude in check?  Does the universe have a way of keeping us in line and not getting "too big for our britches"?  Perhaps...or maybe I'm just being overly analytic.

But, none of those pesky, embarrassing memories from high school or college enter my head when I'm having a shitty day...just sayin'

Rude is the new black

I was on the bus yesterday, enjoying the beautiful Chicago weather and having a peaceful commute.  
An elderly asian woman boarded the bus with a younger girl, possibly in her 20's.
The elderly lady inserted her transit card and proceeded toward the back of the bus, where I was sitting.  The younger girl yelled from the front of the bus "Grandma, they don't take day-passes so I need your transit card".  The older lady returned to the front of the bus and swiped her card a second time, allowing her granddaughter to ride the bus.
When they sat down behind me, the younger girl launched into a barrage of insults toward the elderly woman...
"I can't believe you are such a dumbass grandma!"  "How can you not know that they don't take day-passes in your own goddamn city!"  "I can't believe you are so fucking stupid."
This continued for several minutes.  
But, the grandmother simply stared forward and never acknowledged what her granddaughter was saying.
I was amazed at the way this little girl was speaking to her elder, a member of her own family!  Where on earth did she get off?!
Now, when I was growing up in rural South Carolina, if I had ever uttered something even remotely similar to my grandmother I would have been beaten senseless...and then beaten again even harder!


I entertained a thought for just a moment...what would this little bitch think if I had stood up, turned to face her, and slapped her so hard that she landed on the bus floor...then I would say "That's from your grandmother, you ungrateful skank!"


The thought brought a smile to my face...still does.  


And no one, including myself, came to the aid of the grandmother.  We all just quietly sat and listened to the disrespect...not wanting to cause a scene.
But, it made me realize that this is more commonplace than we'd like to think.  People have developed such a sense of entitlement that they feel it is acceptable to be rude to everyone...even their own family.  


Have we all become so numb to the amount of rudeness we experience everyday that we simply accept it?  
Maybe we have.  But, that color doesn't look good on me.